Photo Credits: Twitter/ Lotfullah Najafizada Aug. 15, 2021

I was recently given feedback on my sentiments for the reality that awaits the women and girls in Afghanistan as the Taliban grab Afghanistan in a chokehold. The feedback was that I have a one-sided and narrowed view on this current situattion.

It really forced me to rethink and reflect on the situation. I didn’t feel the immediate concern for the Afghan men as I did for the women and girls. I do not think that this was on purpose. I was angry, sad and confused about the events that were unfolding. I still am. Almost every war, political conflict and struggle for power that I have read about have been started by men. Often, women and girls suffer the most in terms of having their rights taken away by having another’s will imposed on them. This is just something I have noticed. So when a group of extremist men force their way into power, thus jeopardizing the rights and freedoms of the Afghan people. That makes me really upset. Even more so knowing that the females will have the most to lose from this outcome. I empathize way too much for my own good sometimes and I begin to feel suffocated.

It is difficult to process everything because there are numerous angles to look at the current situation. There is just so much going on. The perspective I have chosen to take is one of human rights. I usually always do. Typing “What does the Taliban rule mean for the Afghan people” into a search engine will bring up articles that discuss how women and girls are the ones with the most to lose. The concern I have is legitimate. The fear I feel for these women is real. I had a few anxiety attacks as I was reading the coverage. I was shaking and crying uncontrollably.  I am so devastated by this. Despite being told how narrow my view was on the situation, I do know that I am allowed to feel grief or pain for the females in Afghanistan. I am allowed to feel angry and scared with them. Regardless of how intensely I feel, I still cannot fully imagine what they must be going through while awaiting their fate. Will they be allowed to go to school? Will they have a say in who they marry? Will they have a say in what they get to wear? Posters of women in Kabul have been shown to be painted over. Thus, symbolically removing their presence in society. In many ways it is foreshadowing what Afghan society will look like.

Now, I understand that this is a difficult time for everyone who is having to live with the reality of the situation. Men face their own struggles, but they are not at risk of losing all their rights. I feel sympathy for them, but my heart does not break for them the same way. As many of the women around the world, I have lived through sexual assault numerous times through out my life. I have experienced the sense of entitlement men feel over my body and mind. So, when I watch the news and read articles describing the bleak future that awaits these women and girls, I get worked up. There was a period where they lived through this back in 1996 to 2001. We have no reason to believe that things will be different.

My sympathy is valid and my pain as well. We are allowed to process this without judgment. When anger or sadness is not enough, I pray. When that is not enough, I write and lend my voice to those who need it. I hope someday they find the means to use theirs.